...and for that, I will not apologize. But I do apologize that you were unwittingly seduced by the power you stumbled upon when our eyes first met. My light may have shone too bright. My essence may have expanded under the focus of your gaze. For certain, you glimpsed my Soul on that day, in her full spectrum of beauty.
Maybe you were caught off guard by the intensity and strength of my beating heart. Enslaved women make up my ancestry, and their rage against their chains pulses through my veins like the flames from which the Phoenix rises. I am that constant burning flame, fixed with passion. It is why you lust for the warmth of my womb. My exoticism goes beyond my black skin. I am like no one you have ever met.
I am a woman. A creature once revered and worshiped and deified. I have not forgotten, but it is possible that you have. Why else would you expect me to settle for anything less than love in its purest form, as if my desires to make love to you, birth life with you, be ravished by you, and merge completely with you could be contained or constricted by fear that we might actually be bound to one another? Fuck the naysayers; they have kept us a part for centuries. You fought for me once before. Maybe you are no longer the man you used to be.
You thought that I would be content with only bits and pieces of you; that I would agree to keep our love a secret; that I would surrender to you without a commitment carved upon an altar erected in celebration of our union? I am a woman – a Queen. I expect to be cherished, protected, and served by my man – my King. Did you forget that you were a King? You commune with your god force, which makes you a worthy King and lover. Perhaps you need me to remind you of your own divinity.
Did you think that I would not remind you, dear King? Did you doubt that I would fight for you, cherish you, or protect and serve you? I commune with my goddess force. My loyalty, not just to you, but to my womanhood and ancestry makes me a worthy Queen and lover. Together, you and I would have ruled the world. We’ve ruled worlds before, you know – from fertile plots of land occupied by generations we created, to mighty kingdoms. Clearly, you have forgotten the history of our love.
But I remember. A woman never forgets. I have made so many sacrifices for you that the heavens above forever pardoned me from any love that struggles. I am a free woman now, free to mate with the King who steps toward me, even when we are both afraid, gladly losing himself under my gaze. A man who would not think twice before leaping across a field of stakes to secure my devotion. A god, inspired to move mountains if it meant that I would be his for eternity.
So I release you.
I am a woman, and for that I will not apologize. But I do apologize that our love could not be realized in this life. Maybe we will find each other again, my King. Maybe you will remember the woman I am, a goddess, your Queen.