“A day without laughter is a day wasted” ~Charlie Chaplain
I always see these types of articles on BuzzFeed and other sites while trolling my Facebook page. So, I thought I would give it a try for fun, considering I am a professional!
I always see these types of articles on BuzzFeed and other sites while trolling my Facebook page. So, I thought I would give it a try for fun, considering I am a professional!
HOW TO DATE (AND KEEP) THE SIGNS OF THE ZODIAC:
ARIES: Make them believe that they are in charge. Get excited about the stuff that they are excited about, and get mad about the stuff that they are mad about!
TAURUS: Regularly treat them to a 23-course meal, preferably with all natural, rich, and exotic ingredients. Bonus if served at home by you – naked.
GEMINI: Build a time machine so that you might be able to keep up with Gemini's scattered energy. This will ensure that the Twins won't get bored. In doing so, Gemini might be faithful.
CANCER: Love their crazy. Seriously. Love their crazy.
LEO: Treat us like you would a child. Give us plenty of love, attention, and kisses. When we act out, do not put up with our shit (ignoring works best IF we really like you, otherwise, we won't care).
VIRGO: It’s simple. Just be perfect…duh! And know that when Virgo criticizes you (and they will) it is usually from a place of love...I think.
LIBRA: Pretend like y’all are in a relationship. Just go with it – do not ask questions. After some time of Libra weighing its options (in the form of other people), he/she may decide to actually commit to you.
SCORPIO: Are you sure you want to date a Scorpio? If you are uncertain, then the answer is “no.” With a Scorpio, you are either in a hundred percent, or you are totally out.
SAGITTARIUS: Be up for anything. Do not be a “stick in the mud.” Let them have the last word – always. Give them a long leash. In doing so, Sagittarius might be faithful.
CAPRICORN: Do not be stupid. To quote Todd Chrisley, “Ignorance can be fixed. Stupid is forever.” Show up on time. Be passionate about something. Make your Capricorn laugh once in a while too – they need that.
AQUARIUS: Be a friend, first. Aquarius needs to know that your friendship is solid before committing to you for good.
PISCES: Be open to doing recreational drugs with them once in a while, and get comfortable with not knowing how your Pisces thinks and operates. It will always be a mystery – that is what attracted you in the first place!
Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign.
ARIES: Make them believe that they are in charge. Get excited about the stuff that they are excited about, and get mad about the stuff that they are mad about!
TAURUS: Regularly treat them to a 23-course meal, preferably with all natural, rich, and exotic ingredients. Bonus if served at home by you – naked.
GEMINI: Build a time machine so that you might be able to keep up with Gemini's scattered energy. This will ensure that the Twins won't get bored. In doing so, Gemini might be faithful.
CANCER: Love their crazy. Seriously. Love their crazy.
LEO: Treat us like you would a child. Give us plenty of love, attention, and kisses. When we act out, do not put up with our shit (ignoring works best IF we really like you, otherwise, we won't care).
VIRGO: It’s simple. Just be perfect…duh! And know that when Virgo criticizes you (and they will) it is usually from a place of love...I think.
LIBRA: Pretend like y’all are in a relationship. Just go with it – do not ask questions. After some time of Libra weighing its options (in the form of other people), he/she may decide to actually commit to you.
SCORPIO: Are you sure you want to date a Scorpio? If you are uncertain, then the answer is “no.” With a Scorpio, you are either in a hundred percent, or you are totally out.
SAGITTARIUS: Be up for anything. Do not be a “stick in the mud.” Let them have the last word – always. Give them a long leash. In doing so, Sagittarius might be faithful.
CAPRICORN: Do not be stupid. To quote Todd Chrisley, “Ignorance can be fixed. Stupid is forever.” Show up on time. Be passionate about something. Make your Capricorn laugh once in a while too – they need that.
AQUARIUS: Be a friend, first. Aquarius needs to know that your friendship is solid before committing to you for good.
PISCES: Be open to doing recreational drugs with them once in a while, and get comfortable with not knowing how your Pisces thinks and operates. It will always be a mystery – that is what attracted you in the first place!
Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign.
