Tracey L. Rogers
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On Love

10/16/2017

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I believe that our ability to truly love another, can be measured by our ability to love ourselves.

If I were to tell you that your ability to love another can be measured by your ability to love yourself, how would you rate your ability to love? Do you even agree with this statement? If not, what is your belief about love (comment below)? I ask, because "love" is a word we use to the point of trendy and slogan-y – Love conquers hate; Love means never having to say I’m sorry; All we need is Love – without much reverence for what the word means, exactly, or how it shows up in our everyday lives.
I would like to think that I do a good job of loving others, but of course, I’m being subjective. In fact, if I were to base my ability to love on how well I loved myself, I would score pretty poorly, and I believe that most people would score poorly too. We are not taught how to love ourselves. What does self-love look and feel like, anyway? To express love of self is often confused with being self-centered or selfish; or worse, perpetuates the association of love with duty and obligation.

If I had to define love, it would be the act of meeting people where they are without judgement, and that definition is based on how I love myself. It does not mean, however, that I could be fully accepting of those incapable of love if that is where they are, as such acceptance could stunt my own growth, and my aim in life is to grow through love. It also does not mean, then, that the act of love is inconstant and does not require practice. I must be patient with how my love evolves, which takes time and practice in the form of gentility, connection, awareness, and even mercy.

A friend of mine defines love as courage - that courage is the pre-requisite for love of self and other. I could not agree more. Courage in love means forgiveness of how we as individuals, and the others in our lives, may falter. Courage in love also means vulnerability; we must be willing to see our love intimately as a gift that is divine, worthy to offer and receive. Love must be completely developed and maintained both internally and externally. If I do not love all of who I am, I will never be able to express universal love.

The New Moon this Thursday puts the Sun and Moon in Libra opposite the planet Uranus in Aries in the sky. These two signs oppose one another on the zodiacal wheel; Libra tends to be more “we” oriented, while Aries is more “me” oriented. Both signs serve an important purpose, and the 180-degree angle being formed above begs the need for balance between "I" and "we." How well you love another can, indeed, be measured by how well you love yourself. Keep this in mind as sudden relationship developments test our capacity to love in the week ahead.

Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign, too.  
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