It is never the tragedy, the grief, nor the painful experience that we fear the most. It is the journey to thrive and overcome where we tend to feel the most inadequate.
A friend and I were discussing Brené Brown in a small group setting a couple of weeks ago. Dr. Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston who studies shame and vulnerability, and has written such books as Rising Strong and Daring Greatly. I hold much reverence for her research that challenges us to examine our fears, while my friend equally despises her for being a “fearful woman.” The two of us had a pretty heated debate triggered by something Dr. Brown once said in an interview: “People should earn the right to hear your story.” I agreed with this statement because I believe that our stories are gifts, and when we share and open up to another person, it should be viewed as an honor and a privilege. My friend had a different opinion, and argued that to hold back from sharing your story keeps you from being vulnerable out of fear. She went on to say that Brené Brown was essentially re-cultivating fear through her work. As much as I begrudged having to agree, my friend made a very valid point.
A friend and I were discussing Brené Brown in a small group setting a couple of weeks ago. Dr. Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston who studies shame and vulnerability, and has written such books as Rising Strong and Daring Greatly. I hold much reverence for her research that challenges us to examine our fears, while my friend equally despises her for being a “fearful woman.” The two of us had a pretty heated debate triggered by something Dr. Brown once said in an interview: “People should earn the right to hear your story.” I agreed with this statement because I believe that our stories are gifts, and when we share and open up to another person, it should be viewed as an honor and a privilege. My friend had a different opinion, and argued that to hold back from sharing your story keeps you from being vulnerable out of fear. She went on to say that Brené Brown was essentially re-cultivating fear through her work. As much as I begrudged having to agree, my friend made a very valid point.
Our fears run deep. Fear is what lurks behind any “but” – “I love you, but,” “I want to help, but,” I know what I need to do, but.” There is always an excuse, a reason, a justification to do or to not do something, and it is easy to convince ourselves that should we attempt to have an experience, we may just come up short – Dr. Brown calls this foreboding joy. The more I connect with others – be it through astrology, coaching, or friendly discussions – the more I realize that at the root of our careful avoidance of things (i.e., life) is the real possibility that we might be called to change, to be brave, and to face our fears. It seems that that would send us over the edge, leaving us, I don’t know, evolved? But what if you could connect, be vulnerable, love wholeheartedly, and live an authentic life, without the fear of being abandoned, rejected, hurt, or ostracized? What if the essence of your spirit was, in fact, impenetrable? What would a fearless life look like to you? What if I told you that you could live free of fear if you simply believed it to be true?
It’s a radical thing, to suggest that we be the authority of our own lives. To me, that entails not caring what others think, purposefully seeking out experiences that spark our Soul, and living in accordance with our own truth. Of course, none of that is possible without taking a fear inventory so that we might recognize our own self-defeating patterns. We would also have to be willing to learn, be open to having what we thought we knew challenged, and get comfortable with big question marks. Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup for the Soul, said we couldn’t have a dream without the capacity to achieve it. So what are some of your dreams, dear friend and reader? What are the many things you wish to do with your life? If there is anything that comes to mind, know that it is possible. You are beyond equipped to bring your dreams to fruition if you prevent fear from getting in the way. I dare you to thrive and overcome.
Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign.
It’s a radical thing, to suggest that we be the authority of our own lives. To me, that entails not caring what others think, purposefully seeking out experiences that spark our Soul, and living in accordance with our own truth. Of course, none of that is possible without taking a fear inventory so that we might recognize our own self-defeating patterns. We would also have to be willing to learn, be open to having what we thought we knew challenged, and get comfortable with big question marks. Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup for the Soul, said we couldn’t have a dream without the capacity to achieve it. So what are some of your dreams, dear friend and reader? What are the many things you wish to do with your life? If there is anything that comes to mind, know that it is possible. You are beyond equipped to bring your dreams to fruition if you prevent fear from getting in the way. I dare you to thrive and overcome.
Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign.
