Tracey L. Rogers
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The Self Actualized

1/31/2016

4 Comments

 
If you are patient with time, time will be patient with you.

Ever since leaving my full time job, I have been complaining about the fact that my days seem to be hijacked. I can’t get a handle on how I manage my schedule. There are no real routines or structures in place that give me a sense of grounding. My attitude with the work on my plate is less urgent, while I become more interested in so many other things. Of course, this is what I prefer; I like that my days do not look the same. I get to indulge my curiosities, and contemplate more intently how I wish to live. But I am frustrated that there is neither a rhyme nor a reason to what I am doing now. The various activities on my calendar do not intersect, and I feel scattered in my desire to follow the many passions in my heart.
I have prayed on this current mode of operation, asking for support, clarity, and discipline. I am aware of my grievances, and the desperation for things to change. But alas, I give up. I am at a point now where I feel as though all I can do is wait – wait for a shift, wait to get my bearings, and accept that I must wait. Waiting, you see, is a part of this process. My salvation lies in sweet surrender. I am unlearning life as it is so that I might prepare for the life that awaits me. This requires the dismantling of a false sense of order and knowing; my life is actually unraveling. For years I have prayed aloud, “dear God, help me to do your will;” never mind the fact that every morning when I practice gratitude, I set an intention to be what is needed of me that day. I would say that my prayers have, in fact, been heard. The universe has received my request, and is now conspiring on my behalf.

How often do we forget that it is all a process? Many of us set the intention to do and to be better, but we forget about that first crucial step, which involves the loss of what was (made worse when we resist). What follows, however, is the inevitable surrender to a new awareness free of conditioning that promotes a self actualized, i.e., whom you are meant to be in accordance with a higher truth. Be careful, then, with what you wish for should you ask for a life of meaning and purpose. Like the ads we see for new drugs approved by the FDA, there are a few disclaimers: the process does not happen overnight. It is not easy. The old stories, structures, routines, excuses, wounds, lies, and fears that kept you living only partial lives will be replaced with new versions of truth. The process is ongoing with milestones along the way that can be attained instantly, or over the course of decades. Once you set off on the journey, life will never be the same, and you will be better for it.


Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store for the week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign too!
4 Comments
Rochelle
2/1/2016 02:31:16 am

1. "The first critical step... is always loss"
Powdering nose, waving hands in the air

#saythat

Badass 101
A badass doesn't expect to do anything well without practice, you're building an empire dear. Remember the OWN network infancy...

Reply
Debbie
2/1/2016 09:58:15 am

The path you have chosen is uniquely yours so there are no restrictions on time. Enjoy the journey!

Reply
Tracey
2/1/2016 02:01:02 pm

Thank you Debbie!

Reply
Natalie
2/2/2016 11:27:38 am

GET OUT OF MY HEAD TRACEY!!!! I have been feeling that way this week and off and on for a while. I set aside the day to work for myself and then it gets hijacked by doing something for someone else. Then I feel guilty about what I didn't do for me. Le sigh.. Anyhoo, great read!

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