“When people show you their red flags, show them your white flags and peace out.” -Unknown
I recently met a guy who I really liked. We had a great first date, great conversation, and we made plans to see each other again. We ended with a long walk and a kiss on each cheek.
I recently met a guy who I really liked. We had a great first date, great conversation, and we made plans to see each other again. We ended with a long walk and a kiss on each cheek.
But then, he began to fall back. He was no longer engaging and barely responsive to my texts. Suddenly, he started canceling our plans.
I could have speculated why his behavior seemed to change. My progressed Sun, Moon and Mercury in Virgo would have been happy to overanalyze to the point of no return.
But the “why” didn’t matter. What mattered was how it made me feel. The inconsistency was an experience I’d had in the past while dating, and it triggered emotional anxiety.
What was different about my reaction this time, however, was that instead of trying to understand what shifted, I advocated for my heart.
I recalled those similar dating experiences that ended badly. I remembered my worth. I sided with my intuition.
I got honest about what I knew would happen if I descended into the rabbit hole of investigation, and ascended to empowered woman, i.e., she who is wise and already knowing.
I paid attention to flashing danger signals and called on the sage advice of Dr. Maya Angelou: “When people show you who they are, believe them.”
I took a deep breath and I peaced out.
I didn’t feel better at first. I wasn’t any less disappointed; in fact, I was sad and weepy. I definitely went into victim mode too.
But I simultaneously reinforced a boundary that reflected my commitment to self, and how I wish to be treated in relationships. I created space for a better opportunity.
Every day, in any life situation, we are given a choice. In those moments we can do what we have always done, even if harmful to our well-being, or we can bravely make a new choice in our favor to change an ongoing pattern and narrative.
We may not always get it right; I may not always get it right. But on this occasion, I evolved.
I knew better.
I did better.
Today, I’m winning.
Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign too.
I could have speculated why his behavior seemed to change. My progressed Sun, Moon and Mercury in Virgo would have been happy to overanalyze to the point of no return.
But the “why” didn’t matter. What mattered was how it made me feel. The inconsistency was an experience I’d had in the past while dating, and it triggered emotional anxiety.
What was different about my reaction this time, however, was that instead of trying to understand what shifted, I advocated for my heart.
I recalled those similar dating experiences that ended badly. I remembered my worth. I sided with my intuition.
I got honest about what I knew would happen if I descended into the rabbit hole of investigation, and ascended to empowered woman, i.e., she who is wise and already knowing.
I paid attention to flashing danger signals and called on the sage advice of Dr. Maya Angelou: “When people show you who they are, believe them.”
I took a deep breath and I peaced out.
I didn’t feel better at first. I wasn’t any less disappointed; in fact, I was sad and weepy. I definitely went into victim mode too.
But I simultaneously reinforced a boundary that reflected my commitment to self, and how I wish to be treated in relationships. I created space for a better opportunity.
Every day, in any life situation, we are given a choice. In those moments we can do what we have always done, even if harmful to our well-being, or we can bravely make a new choice in our favor to change an ongoing pattern and narrative.
We may not always get it right; I may not always get it right. But on this occasion, I evolved.
I knew better.
I did better.
Today, I’m winning.
Check your horoscopes to see what’s in store this week ahead, and don’t forget to read for your Ascendant sign too.
